Helpful Hints for Secret Santa purchases
This year the Panty Posse decided to do Secret Santas instead of buying each and every one of our friends the lace-thong/boobie tassle set she's had her eye on. This was a good thought, but it seems people have run intom some difficulties. After several not-so-anonymous hints, The Roni thought she would send a little knowledge your way.
Here it is, straight from the horse's mouth, what everyone wants:
Regina George, in an ironic twist of fate, would like the Michael Bubble cd. The new one, with the songs he wrote; not the one with just covers. She is also trying to drag The Roni to Ontario to see him in concert. This is not happening for several reasons, the least of which being that The Roni doesn't believe in Canada.
The Bunny would like a light-up, singing vibrator. You know, the one that sings "have yourself a merry little christmas"?
The Roni would like, once again, that's right, this makes TWO not so subtle shout outs for it, a real baseball hat with mesh in the back so she can once and for all cover her hideous grill.
The Sorority Sister would like to drag the river in search of The Preacher, who we're convinced ended up in cement boots at the bottom of a watery tomb somewhere. Guess that's what you get when you join the mafia.
***On a side note about The Sister - just when you think you know someone, they go and do something so ridiculously cool, you wish you had done it yourself. The Sister proves once again why she has soul by packing up and heading to far away NJ to watch The Greatest College Basketball Team on the Planet, and The Roni's current boyfriend JJ Reddick, play this weekend. Sure it's finals. Sure we have exams on MONDAY. But it's The Sister. She dates someone in the mafia. Do you think she cares about trivial things like "grades?"
Speaking of cement boots, Two Boots would clearly like The Roni for Christmas. And he's bought her Something Special (a la the Elf lace teddy...). Baby, if that's what you want, I'm sure Santa can work something out for you...
MMCP would like The Roni to stop calling. Oh, and stop with the carrier pigeons. And the smoke signals. He gets it, and he'd like The Roni to rember the words of Wayne when Stacey says "if you're not careful, Wayne, you just might lose me." To which Wayne replies, "Shyeah, we broke up, are you mental?"
HesterP would like an inner monologue and the ability to control THE SOUND OF HER VOICE. Or at least that's what the people in The 'Brary would like her to get.
The Boobs would like to be able to drink again. All this "studying" is killing her game.
Well, I think that just about covers what everyone would like for Christmas - at least those who have not-so-subtly mentioned to me what they'd like. If you'd like for me to make a post about what you want for Christmas, boys and girls, please feel free to let me know.
Here it is, straight from the horse's mouth, what everyone wants:
Regina George, in an ironic twist of fate, would like the Michael Bubble cd. The new one, with the songs he wrote; not the one with just covers. She is also trying to drag The Roni to Ontario to see him in concert. This is not happening for several reasons, the least of which being that The Roni doesn't believe in Canada.
The Bunny would like a light-up, singing vibrator. You know, the one that sings "have yourself a merry little christmas"?
The Roni would like, once again, that's right, this makes TWO not so subtle shout outs for it, a real baseball hat with mesh in the back so she can once and for all cover her hideous grill.
The Sorority Sister would like to drag the river in search of The Preacher, who we're convinced ended up in cement boots at the bottom of a watery tomb somewhere. Guess that's what you get when you join the mafia.
***On a side note about The Sister - just when you think you know someone, they go and do something so ridiculously cool, you wish you had done it yourself. The Sister proves once again why she has soul by packing up and heading to far away NJ to watch The Greatest College Basketball Team on the Planet, and The Roni's current boyfriend JJ Reddick, play this weekend. Sure it's finals. Sure we have exams on MONDAY. But it's The Sister. She dates someone in the mafia. Do you think she cares about trivial things like "grades?"
Speaking of cement boots, Two Boots would clearly like The Roni for Christmas. And he's bought her Something Special (a la the Elf lace teddy...). Baby, if that's what you want, I'm sure Santa can work something out for you...
MMCP would like The Roni to stop calling. Oh, and stop with the carrier pigeons. And the smoke signals. He gets it, and he'd like The Roni to rember the words of Wayne when Stacey says "if you're not careful, Wayne, you just might lose me." To which Wayne replies, "Shyeah, we broke up, are you mental?"
HesterP would like an inner monologue and the ability to control THE SOUND OF HER VOICE. Or at least that's what the people in The 'Brary would like her to get.
The Boobs would like to be able to drink again. All this "studying" is killing her game.
Well, I think that just about covers what everyone would like for Christmas - at least those who have not-so-subtly mentioned to me what they'd like. If you'd like for me to make a post about what you want for Christmas, boys and girls, please feel free to let me know.
posted by The Roni at 1:00 PM
8 Comments:
Note from The Bunny:
PS Just saw your blog. If I wanted a vibrator for Christmas, I
certainly
wouldn't wnat one that you could buy for less than $15.
That is all.
as the bunny's secret santa i am happy to hear that the vibrator is not on her secret santa wishlist...this santa was not looking forward to trolling local discount sex toy stores looking for the perfect one. and i agree $15 is way too cheap, we're high class us panty posse girls.
Charlottesville Trivia: There is only one sex shop in Charlottesville. And, there will never ever be more than one sex shop in Charlottesville. This is because, long ago, the city council voted to ban all "adult" stores from the city limits. In a compromise, it agreed to let any sex shops existant at the time to keep their doors open. So, one by one, most of the Mohicans have gone out of business. And only one remains. You can find it right behind the KFC on 29, next to Best Buy.
So please support the little sex shop on 29. Without your patronage, sex shops in C'ville could be gone forever.
a) HesterP also needs a phone that will STAY on silent. Another present that the library folks would enjoy.
b) A town ain't a town unless it has a sex shop. ad coelum, thanks for that little bit of knowledge. I will be going to the lil sex shop on 29 tomorrow and buying out all their "furries" videos. (I am absolutely kidding. although there IS a furry here at UVa law...)
His website can be viewed here: http://xepher.net/~kschnee/
He's actually quite well-known within the subculture and nationally well-regarded as a cutting-edge modernist furry author.
i also wish for someone to love me. if someone knows where you can get that for < $15, please let the person who has my name know. sigh... if they can't buy me that, then i guess i'll just take the roni's suggestion and wish to start drinking again. another sigh....
The Roni would like it known that she endorses no such prohibitionist views of HesterP and The Boobs. In fact, The Roni has the exact opposite Christmas wish for them. For if The Roni is going to be reenacting the Mean Girls dance on top of the bar at 2am, then she's certainly not doing it alone...
RG will ALWAYS do the Mean Girls dance regardless of time or place. Being on top of a bar with the Roni is just icing on the cake
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